Reader Question: What’s he got that I don’t?

Personal Style

by megan | on April 9th, 2012 | 0 comments

I just spent the past week in New Orleans for the Final Four tournament and was just baffled by the number of well dressed beautiful woman walking around with men who look like they just stepped out of the gym (or worse, much worse). I get it, I was at a basketball tournament, but really the games only make up about nine total hours over the course of the week of events (and fine dining). I actually see this everyday, but the volume during this trip was staggering. Why do so many women put up with this when it ultimately detracts from them?

{Twilight star Kellan Lutz gets the girl, despite those sweats}

First off, I want to start all sentences with “I was doing [insert cool activity in enviable location here] last weekend when…” but sadly, mine more often start with “I was watching a marathon of The West Wing when…” and then ends with “I fell asleep.” But no biggie.

What you saw in Nola may make you mad, but like you said, it’s not uncommon, and I’d argue it has nothing to do with these ladies’ attraction to activewear. Women tolerate clothes, but love the man. I think there’s a good reason a lot of good guys – a lot of perfectly well-dressed good guys – don’t have a girlfriend: confidence. The same guy that pushes through an extra set of chest flies at the gym – and then walks out wearing his workout gear – is the same guy that’s confident enough to ask a girl way out of his league out on a date.

Because it’s as simple as this: Girls go on dates with guys who ask them.

Not all of them, of course. We have our standards (well, some of us do), but the answer to the unasked question is always no. The guy in the football jersey that goes after a girl out has a 100% higher chance of getting the girl than the guy in pressed khakis twiddling his thumbs in the corner.

I think physical fitness and romantic success have a lot to do with each other. Not because a girl only wants a guy who can shred cabbage on his abs (though, wouldn’t that be fun?), but because guys who feel good about their bodies generally feel pretty good about the rest of what they bring to the table, and it shows.

Of course, a guy’s confidence can come from other things – a keen sense of his own intelligence, having boat loads of money stashed in the bank, or sure, wearing a sharp pair of dub monks to the office. A sound body is just one “lucky penny” that a guy can use to boost his confidence.

So the next time you see a guy in an Underarmour tee and his arm wrapped around the waist of a beautiful girl, stop this from playing on repeat and think: what do I have going for me that would give me the confidence to ask out a girl like that? Because if that dude can, you certainly can. So what is it? A good sense of humor? A job you love (even if it doesn’t make much money)? Impeccable style? Are you captain of your intramural soccer squad? Whatever it is, it’s more than good enough to match that guy.

So go on: ask a girl out, and change the proportion of bros in windpants with beautiful girls.