I can’t believe I’m writing another of these. But here we are.
A convicted felon found legally liable for sexual assault; a man who promised to prosecute his enemies, order mass deportations, and use the country’s military against citizens has been elected president.
Again.
The one campaign promise he kept the first time around? Appointing Supreme Court justices who had no problem lying during the confirmation process in order to get the chance to overturn a woman’s protected right to bodily autonomy.
So it should come as no surprise that our team at Style Girlfriend, and women everywhere, are pretty stressed.
Here’s how you, a man who presumably is also mourning such an outcome, can be a support to the women in your life who are not just disappointed, but scared.
All without a pussy hat in sight.
Don’t tell women it’ll be okay
I know your heart is in the right place, but I cannot tell you how opposite-of-comforting it is to hear right now that “the moral arc of the universe is long but bends towards justice” or even, “It won’t be so bad.”
This is about to be a dangerous time for women, and trans folks, and undocumented immigrants, and anyone else othered by the Trump campaign and soon-to-be second administration.
Telling someone “Better times will come” sounds insensitive at best and ignorant at worst.
And while I can’t keep you accountable on this, let me just say: don’t fool yourself that everything will just somehow, magically be okay.
For you, an upwardly mobile straight, cis man if our Google Analytics data is to be believed? You might make it to the other side of the next four years relatively unscathed! For others? Definitely not.
And I know you’re not just thinking about yourself, or you would have voted a different way.
Bottom line? Don’t not say it to other people, and check your privilege when you find yourself privately engaging in this kind of wishful thinking.
Get in fights
You heard me. If you’re within earshot of a shitty “Your body, my choice”-type comment, whether from a stranger, friend (ugh), or cousin of a friend of a friend, say something.
Call them out. Tell them you find that kind of language disgusting, and let them know that in no uncertain terms that it’s unacceptable to speak that way around you.
Do not laugh it off so as not to make waves in a social situation. Don’t ignore it. Loudly intervene on behalf of those who may not feel safe doing so.
Wear your merch
If you bought a Harris Walz camo hat during the campaign, or a “Vote For Your Rights” sweatshirt, keep wearing it.
Long after Inauguration Day.
A MAGA hat telegraphs a person’s values, and is meant to intimidate people who think differently. Make the opposite true, too.
Let like-minded folks know you are a safe zone for them, and let would be Ben Shapiros know you’re not to be messed with.
Is it virtue signaling? Sure.
Is it all you need to do? Absolutely not.
Your activism does not end with your fashion choices, but it certainly is part of them.
Prune your online presence
Sign out of Twitter. Forever. We’re planning on it here at SG HQ.
And while you’re at it, reconsider your relationship to streaming services like YouTube and Twitch, and rethink the podcasts you listen to.
It’s looking like a big way we got ourselves into this mess is by relying on an unhealthy, increasingly broken news and information ecosystem.
So ask yourself: Am I gobbling up the Olestra of online media?
And I hear you pushing back:
“I know how to judge for myself what to believe and what to ignore.”
“But the hosts are funny!”
Okay! That’s up to you, of course.
But if you’d be embarrassed to be overheard listening to it, even for five minutes out of a two-hour stream, consider cutting it from your media diet and use that time to read a book by a woman instead!
Be intentional with your consumerism
Cancel your Amazon Prime membership and donate that amount to a cause you believe in.
Buy your soap at a local co-op. Or hell, a box chain store that didn’t donate to the Trump campaign, like Target.
Shop small businesses this holiday season.
You vote with your dollars as much as anything else. We’re working now on figuring out what that looks like from Style Girlfriend, so stay tuned.
Get involved
Run for state senate. Or school board. Join a bowling league. Volunteer at an abortion clinic.
Yes, you can still stay home and binge Netflix, too, but make an effort to wade into the world more than before.
I worry about what a second Trump term will do — what the man’s ascendency has already done — to our ability to empathize with others.
If so many can see a man who is homophobic, racist, and hates women, and not consider those qualities a dealbreaker? Well, how can we expect to take care of one another?
Counteract hate by placing yourself firmly in community with others. Empathy is a muscle you build by using it more. Nurture your understanding of and sensitivity towards those beyond your immediate circle by putting in the reps over the next four years.
