6 Ways to Impress Women, According to Women
SG HQ spills the ways to make ladies swoon
By Style Girlfriend | Apr 29 2016
We’re here to make it official; you can catch a good woman’s eye without dropping stacks on new threads or committing to a 5-star restaurant courtship. All you need to worry about to really impress her? Being the best version of yourself. The Style Girlfriend team is here with some surefire wins on doing exactly that. Want to know can’t-miss ways to impress women? Read on.
The ladies of SG HQ share surefire ways to impress women:
A (Moderately) Grand Gesture
Did anyone see Kanye West pronounce his wife’s world-famous last name wrong on Kocktails with Khloe’s last episode? (Don’t judge me, I just watched a clip online that was making the rounds).
He somehow managed to make “Kardashian” rhyme with “Parmesan,” if you can imagine it. For her part, Kim looked…not even upset, so much as confused? So I guess what I’m saying is: baseline level of expectation of impressing women at this point is pronouncing her name right – especially if you’re married.
Beyond that, moderately big gestures early on in a relationship are always nice. If you think you like this person, do yourself a solid and legit delight her with a move that will make her friends jealous they’re not living in a romantic comedy starring Anne Hathaway. Seamless some french fries from her favorite restaurant uptown to her office downtown, or call the bar where she and her girlfriends are doing happy hour and buy the group a round. Heck, show up to the movies with a drugstore hat trick tucked up your sleeve (Sour Patch Kids, Reese’s Pieces and mini bottles of booze to spike your jumbo soda, obviously) and I guarantee she’ll be bowled over.
Hold Your Own
I love when a guy can hold his own in a crowd or a group of people, especially if he’s never met them before.
I’m not saying be the center of attention. But if I’ve brought you to an event or a party, show that you don’t need to be babysat all night. Strike up conversations, introduce yourself, and form your own connections with my friends/coworkers/family.
Don’t Phone It In
Keeping your phone out of the dating equation makes all the difference. I know I make a conscious effort to keep mine away…until they take it out, then I’ll pull out mine (it’s a slippery slope like that).
I personally hate the cultural desire to be perceived as busy, and nothing says I’m busier – and therefore more important than you – than pulling out your phone in the company of someone else.
Take listening to the next level
I know, I know… “Women just want a guy that listens” has been touted as the secret for winning any female affection in every magazine on your lady friend’s coffee table, but here’s the thing: that doesn’t mean she wants someone to talk at for hours on end: what’s really great is when a guy engages you in conversation and adds as much as he absorbs.
We want you to know that a fun round of conversation ping-pong goes a long way.
I went on a few (read: very few) dates with a fellow who so rarely offered up commentary or asked a question back to me, that happy hour outings ended up feeling like interrogation sessions…not a dating tactic I’m trying to develop.
While hearty banter secures you a direct line to my compliment center, I’m even more impressed when a guy references prior conversations we’ve had. It not only shows that you were listening, but that you’re interested enough to make space in your mind to keep that intel rattling around alongside sports stats and your mom’s birthday.
As in: If your date mentions a big work presentation coming up, take a literal few seconds to ping her afterwards and ask how it went. Did she bring up her love of live music and name drop a local band she’d like to see? Then she’s basically done the work for you when it comes to planning the perfect second date. It’s the ultimate flattery.
Do You
I’m always most impressed when I can sense that a guy is truly being himself. Nothing is worse than getting the sneaking suspicion that a guy is trying to play a game somehow or is just holding back parts of himself. I’m trying to get to know YOU so show me who you are!
It’s going to come out sooner or later anyway, so why not just surrender to your weird/dorky/sarcastic side now? Who knows, maybe I’m INTO that particular quality. So don’t censor yourself too much, even on a first date. If you don’t want to wait three days to text (which is silly and borderline rude anyway) then don’t do it just because you think it’s a “rule.” Do you.
Mindful Manners
Call me cliché, but manners are the number one way to impress me. The last guy I dated always opened the car door for me and would help me with my jacket when we’d go out to eat. It never got old, and always made me feel special and appreciated.
Also, as a freelance fashion writer, I’m often wary of trying to describe my job to a new guy. It’s beyond impressive when a date—even if he has absolutely no clue about freelancing, writing or god forbid, style—asks thoughtful questions about what I do.
TELL ME:
WHAT’S YOUR SECRET WEAPON WHEN FOR IMPRESSING WOMEN…A DAPPER LOOK? A QUICK WIT?
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Both Megan and Brit show that personalizing the experience is big in making someone feel special – I do that with everyone from the kids I coach, the people I work with to my friends and my wife. Remember the names of people in their lives, favourite sports teams etc. When one of my team ended up in hospital I visited him with a stakc of guitar magazines – remembering he loved guitar and taking the time to bring them to him counted for a lot.
I love the smuggled booze idea Megan – that one never gets old. Especially good when camping of being outside when it is cold.
Gabi that is why my phone stays in my pocket at the office too, excellent point.
Yes! That kind of thoughtfulness doesn’t go unnoticed
I am fine with myself…thanks for your company or no company.
These are all great tips/reminders. Regarding Lizzie’s point, I feel like I did score some pretty good points with the new girl I’m seeing there. She actually brought me a long on a trip to Deep Creek MD with a bunch of her friends from college. I’m a pretty outgoing person as it is, so I’ve never had a problem integrating into any group of people (I can talk to anyone, anytime, anywhere), but in a situation like that I think it really a good impression both with her friends and her.
I think it also helped that I was able to bring the Cards Against Humanity for the trip, which will always break ice.
That is awesome to hear! And yes, CAH is always a crowd pleaser
Thats great! And sounds really fun! Nice work 🙂
A lot of my charm is right in line with Jen’s “do you” – I do my best when keeping it light. “If the shoe fits, I want you to wear it and wear it good” in the words of Tony! Toni! Tone! I am a natural banterer and I just roll with it. Will I tease? Of course! If a woman won’t fire back, we’re probably not suited.
+1,000 for the Tony! Toni! Tone! reference (and using the correct punctuation and spelling)
I’m right there with you on the teasing point! I’m nothing if not committed to banter.
flowers at the office.
can literally never go wrong with this move
or you could do that thing where you go to her boss and be like can she get friday off work and then you surprise her with a weekend away, I did that before. Pretty well received.
oooh, that’s a good one
Great post! I always get frustrated when guys say “men can’t listen to women for dating advice.” Yes you can. If a guy makes a habit of everything in this post he’s going to have to make a special calendar for all the dates he gets.
For example, Jen’s “be yourself” advice. So true! The instinct to self-censor is strong, especially if the guy thinks a woman is out of his league and he therefore has to behave in some arbitrary special way to earn his way to her side of the fence, as it were. I can’t count how many times I gave in to some random silly impulse and found out THAT was what she liked best.
I think it also ties in to Lizzie’s post from the other day about opening up about politics. When you’re being yourself you get to find out if you’re not compatible right off the bat. It’s another major advantage of not putting on airs.
I couldn’t agree more, Dan!
It’s terrifying to say this, but right now in society just treating a woman (or man) like a human person makes you stand out. The misogony and sexism going on today shock and horrify me. So I always try to be 100% present, listening, and reflect back what I’m hearing from someone in a kind way. And off my phone (I may have given Gabi an AMEN). To me, it’s just respect.
That, and wearing my lavendar smoking jacket.
It’s surprises/saddens me at how true this is. A male co-worker of mine and I held the two doors to our building open for some younger female coworkers earlier this week. As we all waited for the elevator up, they commented on how refreshing it was to have “gentlemen” around for a change… because we held the doors open for them.
I was shocked that something so trivial (I hold the door open for everyone!) was noteworthy to them.
Preach!
It’s something so simple that doesn’t take more than a few seconds. I can’t understand how more guys don’t do it. Then again, a lot of things that seem simple aren’t done anymore. I guess I’m old fashioned, even though I’m not yet 40.
Don’t worry, I’m old fashioned too 🙂
Don’t worry, I’m old fashioned too 🙂
It’s something so simple that doesn’t take more than a few seconds. I can’t understand how more guys don’t do it. Then again, a lot of things that seem simple aren’t done anymore. I guess I’m old fashioned, even though I’m not yet 40.
In my case, I look at what isn’t necessarily offered by the immediate surroundings or context and try to deliver it myself. Little wonder why when it comes to my friends/SOs, I tend to be the opposite of their personality.
For example, for someone who isn’t especially outgoing, they probably would like to have someone who complements their energy level and has something to add to the table. Hence, I try to be empathetic yet add a bit of humor. And when it’s someone rarely seen and often busy, keeping convos short, sweet and affable is a good route to go when it comes to making an impression and to tie back to Brit’s point, remembering something from a convo past to keep the ball rolling.
That and some well-placed pop-culture references help loads!
Megan did you check out Alpha M video saying don’t let women pick out your clothes?
Hm, I didn’t. What did he say? Any convincing arguments?
he says that women dress men for themselves.
I like each of these, but especially agree with Brit and Gabi. Be present. Listen. Ask good questions. Work to remember things that you can circle back to later. It’s really not that hard to do. And I always turn my phone on airplane mode for a date. It doesn’t come off airplane mode until after it’s over.
And actually, I have a tattoo on my right inner forearm that reads “I am right here with you” as a reminder to me (and the person/people I’m present with) that I’m engaged here and now with them…not off in technology world somewhere else.
Um, I looooove this. I’m not a tattoo person, but as far as things to get permanently etched on your body, that’s a good one to (quite literally) carry with you through life!
I like to think that I follow Jen’s advice pretty well, and not just in dating. I always strive to just be myself. I think it has served me well in friendships, dating, and professionally.
some said deep conversation with someone (man) listening is other way to the next level
Sound Advice from the ladies of Style GF!
As far as Grand Gestures go where does sending postcards to someone you’re interested in while traveling fall? 🙂
Love that!!!! Go for it!
Smiling really really big and excited to talk about whatever. The more positive and weird, the more fun. It’s all about a dance, but with my words, thoughts , facial expression and above all else, attitude.
Ps, why am I always two months behind when commenting on these articles? ????